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Anxiety
03:39
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My pulse stops, but my heart is pounding, all at once
Paradox, like the next statement that I say is false:
“That was true.” See what I mean? What’s a guy supposed to think?
My tongue is twisted, brain is teased, I’m riddled with anxiety
I can’t explain it, maybe it’s a chemical reaction
Believe me, I wish that I could tell you how and why this happens
But I feel it in my throat, feel it in my stomach
I’m shaking, head to toe, my body cannot even function
So that takes us all the way back to that earlier question:
I’m paralyzed, but my heart is beating faster every second, why?
Maybe I’m over-thinking, I overanalyze
I’m over you, I tell myself, but can’t get you out of my mind
Out of my mind, I’m out of my mind
Maybe that’s the diagnosis, and insanity has me blind
I pinch myself, but I’m still awake
Or still asleep? I don't know, cuts to black when the top shakes
I need to slow down, pull myself together
If only I’d socialize, vocalize a little better
Wish I’d say what’s on my mind, instead of acting like I’m shy
Introverted, conservative, dwell on how my thoughts are worded
And I try my best to tell myself to let you go
But you highjack my sub-conscience when my head hits the pillow
Invading my every thought, invading every dream
And I wake up wondering if anything is as it seems
So I reach across the comforter and grab my phone
No new notifications, I’ve got nowhere to go
It’s probably for the best that I stay in bed
Rather than risk the opportunity to lose my head
Even if I got a text, “Can you come out and play?”
I doubt I’d leave the house even if I miss your face
It’s hard to explain these mind games that I play
But if you really want an answer, here’s what I got to say:
The truth is, I get nervous when I’m around you
Excuses, excuses are all I’ve got to feed into your brain
Trust me, when I say it’s not you, it’s me to blame
The proof is in the way that my obsessive mind
Refuses, refuses to let me find the courage to call out your name
Yeah, my anxiety is telling me to stay awake
It was love at first peripheral glance
Made me feel just like I did back at a middle school dance
We were walking up the stairs, and I couldn’t help but stare
From the corner of my eye, hypnotized, in a trance
Now every time you favorite one of my tweets
I can feel my paradoxical heart skip a beat
Wish I could reach through the screen, and tell you how much it means
When you show this introvert the attention that he needs
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